Intermediate Composition
19 Dec 1997
Dave Barry
HELLO WORLD! LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO DAVE BARRY!
Dave Barry writes about human experiences first hand and
takes into account the human nature of things he witnesses, as typical or as
bizarre as they can be, and takes them to paper either just humorously, sarcastically,
or is simply honest WITH a tiny bit of other spices and ingredients added. Dave
Barry is both extremely normal and totally crazy all at once- if that is possible
and it is. The experiences he gets to are primarily domestic and very American
but they have enough jam-packed satirical stuff in them to write
a book- this alone is the idea behind one of his articles (the amount of people
writing books,that is). He startles us with ranges in topics from the stock
market to education to family trips and seeing buffalo poop. If the content
can not conjure a chuckle or giggle out of you then his bold face words and
playing around with language are sure to draw your attention somehow. I chose
Dave Barry for the fact that I had never read (or sadly heard) of him before.
But now I must say that I am a big fan and Dave Barry just might give me a reason
to more frequently grab the Spectrum.
Dave Barrys articles make his life seem just as mumbled jumbled as his
ideas since he rarely has a particular order to them. He must be brainstorming
all the time or instantly finds something in a moment and jots it down on his
hand like I do, NOT to remember its existence until bathing. To talk of him
requires a little mumbling and jumbling on my part.
The themes found within Barrys articles are not necessarily opinions,
though they are sprinkled with them, but simple sarcastic or funny observations
correlating sometimes with the media news at the time or with other current
concepts with a more insight to human actions. He has a vast knowledge of the
politics occurring of the time and must keep up with plenty of reading. Astride
from this, I do not know what can be floating around his mind to come up with
some of the thesises he has had. What does he find so fascinating or insane
about things and how does he know what the general public will find hilarious?
Some examples that you normally wouldnt find too funny are: his trip to
the winery, news events, and golfing.
He takes a simple gander through a winery and comes up with this little inner
outburst while watching men at the age of 22 engage in a discussion of the years
of good wine:
Whats WRONG with you? When I was your age I was drinking Sunshine
Premium brand beer (motto: Made from Ingredients) at $2.39 a CASE!
(Spectrum Aug. 26, 1997)
Perhaps this is cute because it is true for college students, a crowd he is
in tune to, on their small salaries. He found that news within news is intriguing
especially when the world is supposedly so preoccupied with a celebrity death.
Suddenly the shadowed worldly news becomes even more belittled.
In non- celebrity news, the stock market has crashed; war broke out in
the Middle East; a volcano has erupted in Seattle; militants in the rebellious
Russian province of Brzkszckrzkzistan, angry over the chronic shortage of vowels....
(Spectrum Oct. 24, 1997)
Making fun of the news with some truth, since there are many shortage of items
in Russia and their names are difficult to pronounce, and exaggerated sarcasm
is one of
his favorites as the is the communication that is shared between people, say,
in a round of golf.
TOM: Bill, before I attempt to shank this birdie, Id
like to know your gut feeling on the use of quotation marks in the
newspaper.
BILL: Tom, I feel they are overused.
TOM: I agree. Lets formulate a policy on that.
BILL: And then lets try on evening gowns.
TOM: Yes! Well accessorize with brooches! (Spectrum Oct. 10, 1997)
Whatever he comes up with and wherever he finds these ideas has got to be quite
an interesting place because he seems to be able to poke humor at anything.
Being from North Dakota I could not have ever thought of places to joke about
here- BUT that is Dave Barrys inner motive- to discover sarcastic and
funny entities in everything. Besides declaring South Dakotas official
state motto: Gateway to North Dakota, he looks to descriptions you
might write in a journal on a trip:
Mount Rushmore is located in the Black Hills, which get their name from the
fact that they are brown, gray and green. They were caused by erosion. In fact,
just about all the major natural attractions you find in the West- the Grand
Canyon, the Badlands, the Goodlands, the Mediocrelands, the Rocky Mountains
and Robert Redford- were caused by erosion (Spectrum Sept. 19, 1997).
Not only are places easy for him to conjure up insane ideas from but he likes
people too. Barbara Walters, scientists, and, well, almost anyone including
himself. Barbara is mentioned in the article discussing celebrities deaths as
Barry comments on her way of speaking, etc.
CELEBRITY: Being famous?
BARBARA: No, my little frown of concern. Im thinking of having it fixed.
CELEBRITY: Whats a fwown(Spectrum Oct 24, 1997)?
Also the scientists and medical world are on his hit list as well.
...Aristotle, who is considered the Father of Medicine because he invented the
following phrases, without which modern medical care would be impossible:
Do you have insurance?
Were going to have to run some tests.
You may experience some discomfort.
Were going to have to run some more tests.
The tests were inconclusive (Spectrum Sept.5, 1997)
And then to make a full circle of this piece, I end with the November seventh
article on An epic struggle to get educated because he mocks himself
and the education system out there, just as he had in a previous opinion column
about the SATs. This entity has to make you smile because of the fact
that the statements within are quite realistic.
I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so
they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.
If this isnt funny enough this next round about way of eating and studying
is hilarious and the mixture of suddenly being on the side of science is amusing
as well.
Nevertheless, I stressed to Rob that he should make this homework his absolute
highest priority, allowing nothing to come ahead of it, but that first we would
go out for Italian food. I like to do this with Rob because he always orders
pizza, which I am not allowed to eat because it contains cholesterol, but it
is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take
it from another persons plate.
If only every parent would write an article to get their kids out of doing homework
once in a while life would be much easier.
No matter what Barry gets his wild ideas from, we can see and realize that he
has got SOME talent to take the ordinary and make it, in a sort of nutty way,
extraordinary. And, hey, he receives payment, we giggle, and everyone is happy.
What more could you want from a fellow who make you belt out-
HEY,YOU GOTTA READ THIS!