John: So, what is going on with you? The next time you don't talk to me for two weeks.. I am goin' beat the livin' shit out of you. (laughs, orders another beer)

Mark: Man, John. Lemme tell you what's up.

I have never wanted to do something just because I had to... and, to be honest, that is how I viewed my relationship with Mary. Don't get me wrong, she's hot and nice and smart, but that's just it. The fit was too good. We didn't have any conflict. None.

John: Um, that is a GOOD thing sometimes you know dipshit?

Mark: Yea, but we never fought. Rarely. She forgave me in like 5 seconds whenever I did anything wrong. Like that night you and I got so shitty that I puked right on her front lawn.

John: That night RULED. Man, she is awesome. Um, what is she up to now?

Mark: Shut the fuck up.

Anyhow, Tatum... Tatum (smiles)...

John: Oh Shit. You love someone else ALREADY? Seriously, fuck up, where is MARY?

Mark: John, I'll give you her number, calm down. Tatum is this girl that... well, she blows me away. She's charming, extremely independent, and witty, and... like all the things Mary had but in larger, beautiful-er capacities.

John: She's got massive jugs, huh?

Mark: Well.. goddammitt John. Will you listen?

John: THAT's why you haven't called! You've been screwing this Tate girl. You DAWG! I love ya. Man, I am jealous, but I love ya.

Hey, Bill, we need two shots of Jagermeister over here! Put 'em on my tab!